Thursday, August 20, 2009

Believing My Heart And Finding Hope Again

There are times, when the nights are cold and the wind whistles through the cracks in the floorboards and the walls, that I lose hope. There are times when I wonder if my family will ever see the sun again and feel warm under its rays. Life's simple pleasures are few and far between underground, and even when one manages to stumble across one, it brings little joy. Because as quickly as you discover something that brings you happiness here, just as quickly will they take it away from you.

We are not allowed to feel joy here. Our minds must always remain focused on work. Work is all we've been told to expect out of life and so we act accordingly. They've nipped our humanity in the bud and seek to make us little more than drones. Drones that follow obediently, walk in straight lines do what they're told when they're told to do it and nothing more or less. We are slaves. That, dear friends, is what their romanticised story about the great war and its outcome fails to tell you. We were not welcomed with open arms for any other reason than to be enslaved by the Proscript Party in all it's infinite glory.

They sicken me.

At first I was angry. Then afraid. Then angry again. I considered making the most out of what life had dealt me. But fate, fate has no hand in this. This is not my fate nor my destiny, and these cards were not dealt by some higher power. The Proscript Party is not God. They are not King and Country and Ruler. They are scum and now I feel nothing but disgust at the sight of them and all that they stand for. The occasional scraps of kindness we are thrown do nothing to make up for years of Slavery and punishment. I watch them, daily as they stuff their faces and lay around their comfortable homes - reaping the rewards won by the sacrifices of MY PEOPLE.

Perhaps, not for much longer. They've tried to stamp out any chances of a rebellion. Oh they have tried. But you can't treat someone they way we've been treated for so, so long and not expect any consequences. Those consequences are coming. I don't know when and I don't know how, but I know, in my heart I know. And I have to believe what my heart is telling me, because if I don't...then all hope is lost. And without hope, then so are we.

MK.

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